Technologically Un-Impaired

Well, here we are at the end of the month, and I can honestly say this has been the easiest challenge of them all. Unlike the dietary challenges, this one was much easier to maintain, as I was solely fighting a mental and not a physical craving. Against my will, I would crave meat, sugar, or caffeine, and felt miserable in their absence. When I craved some video game action or the like, I just shrugged it off and did something else. It was quickly no trouble at all to ignore.

Not to say there was no pain. At first, I struggled to fill my time. This led to a sort of depression, as I felt all I did with my life was passively watch and surf (the internet, not the ocean. That would be awesome). But I began to realize that my life was more full due to the increased reading and time spent outside. Therefore my views changed and I was happy to have removed this unnecessary part of my life.

So much time was wasted by me on passively switching my mind off. I suppose that's the big difference: even though reading is physically passive, the brain is forced to be active. And therefore the quality of time is better and you feel your nights and weeks are longer/better.

I will absolutely go back to watching TV, playing video games, and using the internet. Hell, I doubt I could give up podcasts if I tried! But I highly recommend trying this challenge out. It has really given me a different perspective on my life and my free time. Hopefully, I will be able to compartmentalize to their appropriate places as a part of my life instead of the dominant factor.

Next month: the month of exercise!

Willpower

No matter how much you like reading, there comes a moment where you simply get bored and can't read any more. Due to this, I have become much more tidy and active throughout the day, as I seek to alleviate my boredom and temper my restlessness.

My apartment is cleaner, and chores like laundry and waste disposal are completed with much greater frequency. The little niggling chores I used to avoid for weeks (like paying bills, picking up groceries, and scheduling appointments) are completed promptly. Since I am eager not to overdose on reading, I eagerly seek stuff out to do before this happens. I am also more likely to switch tasks after a couple of hours.

Case in point: last Sunday, I went out for an early brunch, then spent a couple hours reading. I went home and watched a DVD before heading back out to go to an expo. I went back home to eat some dinner before meeting up with my friend and catching the end of the NBA playoffs. Finally, I went home.

This is not the kind of day I would likely have had a month ago. The day would have ended with the DVD, as I switched over to watching something else and vegetating. I lacked the self-control to stop myself, which I suppose is a theme of this whole challenge. I am bad at impulse control even though I have fairly strong willpower. Without an incentive, I simply do whatever I feel like.

Going Clean

Outside of typing these posts, and the occasional use of a computer at work, I have not used a computer all month. And frankly, I'm glad that I haven't been. Anytime I must use a computer for a prolonged period of time (such as today for instance), I begin to settle into the chair in a weird way. My body does not want to be sitting for such a long time. And my eyes start to feel weird. Not hurt exactly, but a weird sort of unpleasant dulling sensation.

I quickly start to feel as though my brain is less responsive, and I seek any excuse to get up and walk around. When my day is done, I am relieved and my desire to spend any time online or otherwise with my phone or computer.

Sure, I still can't wait until I am free to do as I please again. But I also feel like I will be far less inclined to spend time idly. I actually tried going on Facebook today and immediately got so bored and felt so numb that I switched it back off almost immediately. I wanted to engage with it, but just couldn't maintain interest.

Ties

 I am a social creature who is uncomfortable around people. I love to engage people in conversations, make jokes, and generally be out in the world absorbing the sights, sounds and other sense stimuli. Or rather, I did like this, stopped doing it, and have been learning to love it again.

As previously mentioned, I have picked up some silly anti-social behaviors as of late. Because of the stresses and time commitments, I have been unable (and frankly, unwilling) to make plans with friends and family.

For the most part, I would say I am a fairly decent planner. I worked hard to organize nights out and to make arrangements to see my friends as often as I could. I was the one who would bully and cajole people into a night on the town. I was the one who would have a party and think carefully about who to invite so that my eclectic mix of strangers who mesh well.

Somewhere along the way, I lost sight of that as a goal, and lost touch with many friends. I stopped being the instigator, and so I stopped getting together with people. Certainly, the blame is not solely on me, as my friends could have also contacted me if I failed to contact them. But I am equally to blame in this case, as everyone always has a million things going on in their adult lives that need attending.  

So once again I am making the effort to be an arranger. There is nothing more gratifying than spending time with ones friends and loved ones.

Passing Fancy

My interest in acquiring new skills and abilities has reawakened! Like many people, I have had lofty goals about learning a new language, picking up an instrument, and learning to draw (just to name a few).

However, I also haven't really done anything about building proficiency in these skills. Sure, every few months I'll make an attempt at a beginner lesson in French or I noodle around on an instrument. But this only happens for a couple of days or weeks before it is shelved again, not to be remembered.

For the past year or so, I have been busy. First with school, then work. All while trying to maintain a healthy work-life balance (I haven't been very successful). I would go an entire school term without a day in which I wasn't working or at school. I dropped pretty much everything in my life just to keep going forward and succeed during this difficult period. In order to unwind, I would vegetate and become an utterly passive binge watcher. I didn't read, write, or pursue health or hobby. I just existed to get through the moment.

That desire to learn and know had not abated in me, but merely lay dormant. Only now, after a harsh and bitter winter, can I finally say I feel the urge to grow as a person swell up again. It is a good feeling. I mean to make it last.

Wasting Away

I hadn't realized it sooner, but I don't spend my time well. This is not to say I waste it, but that I am very likely to fall into patterns of behavior that become habits. I am very prone to continuing to do a task I enjoy until the point it no longer becomes enjoyable anymore. For instance, when I worked as a server, I would get home late at night, and fell into watching TV or catching up on a show to unwind after a late night. Well, a single hour would lead to two, and then three. Eventually I was staying up until 4, 5, or even six in the morning just binge watching stuff. And that wasn't me at college age, but my more recent, supposedly more mature age!

It got to the point that I wasn't waking up until noon at the earliest. I tried to break the pattern, but found I had created a vicious habit and cycle. It was hard to go to bed before 2 because I just wasn't tired. And it didn't have lingering consequences to my life at that time, since I worked at night and was single. My motivation to reform was easily sapped. Eventually, school and a different job conspired to force me to amend my habits, but it was a long and slow process. I had many a night of very little sleep in preparation for an 8am class, where I simply could not sleep.

I bring this up because I am aware of how I have become so attached to the idea of down-time after work that I have fallen into the same habit of coming home after work and immediately vegetating. Yes, now I am reading instead of binge watching. But again, I am maintaining the bad habit that I wished to avoid nonetheless. The only difference now is I feel more likely to get up and move around after a bit of reading. Reading is great, and can separate you from the outside world. But I find it hard to completely zone out in the same way. Hopefully I can maintain this new behavior, with enough practice. 

Podcasting

So an interesting thing has occurred. Feeling a bit of nostalgia or craving (take your pick) for podcasts, I realized I still had a couple of podcasts kicking around on my phone from a long while ago. So I decided to listen to them as a lark.

The thing is, I got really bored very quickly. Don't get me wrong; there are some really great and engaging podcasts. I still really enjoy the comedy podcasts I listen to, but those are professional comedians and improvisers who deliver great performances in order to gain more exposure and get their name out. These shows, such as Comedy Bang Bang and improv4humans, are as good and funny as any show on TV.

But I also listened to a lot of shows that are just filler and act as background noise. Most of them could be defined as "talking head" shows; the format is always interview style with special guests and the whole content is derived from that. While there is nothing new or wrong in that, it does get a little tiresome when you consider the thousands of podcasts out there following this model. Merely emulating the radio interview style (which most do, with more adult language) has lost its charm for me, and just seems dull.

Tap-Tap-Tap

I listened to so many podcasts so frequently throughout the week that I always had headphones on throughout the day while I was travelling. This has become so much the norm that I scarcely ever had them off my head while I was on my own. While I have listened to music in some instances this month, I still listen much less frequently, as I get bored much more easily with music and my mind starts to wander. So the headphones are off more than on these days.

As a result,  I have come to notice and appreciate the ambient sounds and noise of a city that hit your ears as you make your way around.* Snippets of conversations, the sound of footsteps, the rattle of a dog collar: all are pleasant to my ears. Perhaps it is still a novelty for me, and I will soon tire of it. But I think it has as much to do with simply letting your ears be passive recipients to the world around you, instead of actively noticing the angry honking or cars and so forth as I used to do. Headphones were used to block out the bad, but they blocked out the good as well.  

*It's worth noting the apparent contradiction to my previous post a couple of days ago, decrying the background white noise at home. This is different from the natural and organic noise caused by a city and its thousands of citizens in the act of living. That is an artificial blockage that one creates themselves. The former is engaging the world around you, albeit in a passive way.

Technicalities

I will admit, I haven't totally avoided using my smartphone. I have found it necessary to check the weather before I leave the house, or to see when the next bus or streetcar is coming. While this is technically cheating, I don't really believe it's a problem. The reason I went into this was to avoid the more addictive qualities of technology. Quickly checking the weather or ETA is informative and convenient, but addictive it is not.

As I have said, I needed access to my e-mail this month for various work purposes and communication. And I need to be able to type in order to document the process as well. So my contact with my phone is greatly reduced. What I have noticed when I do go to use it for utilitarian purposes is that it feels hard to use and foreign to me, like I recently acquired one for the first time. I get annoyed at it very easily and I feel using it to be a nuisance. It's gone back to being a tool I use, but unlike a wrench or roll of tape, one I view with increasing belligerence.

White Noise

You never realize how accustomed you are to background noise until you don't have it anymore. Because of music, podcasts, TV, and movies, I almost always had something generating noise in the background. Now that I more or less have done without it for the last month, I am well aware its lacking in my life.

Since I am without it, I feel it was having an adverse effect that I scarcely realized. Having background noise has a sort of dulling effect on the mind, and makes it harder to organize your thoughts. In my case, while I can say I wasn't in a stupor, I definitely wasn't thinking as clearly as now. I mean, this is the effect my smartphone has also had on my brain. It scatters your thoughts, makes you forget what you set out to do, and makes you uncommunicative to those around you. Ask any parent of a kid with an iPhone and you'll know what I'm talking about. It's definitely causing a communication gap in society, as friends and couples sit around the dinner table or in a bar, not speaking and staring down.

 Well, the fog has lifted in my case. I feel as though I have access to thoughts both good and bad that simply did not exist a short time ago. My brain seems better able to process  and recall information, and my memory seems to be better. Who can say the cause of this is, but I feel there must be a correlation between a lack of addictive screen time and my perceived mental improvement.

The Upward Limit

I'm sick of reading. It's finally happened, at exactly the point I get tired of all these challenges throughout the month. Except I'm not dying to watch TV or play video games. Although I would certainly like to do those things, I don't feel it as a senseless beating drum of a compulsion as I did for say, coffee or meat. I merely seek them out as something else to do.

I don't want to give it up. Rather, I have just reached the upward limit of how much I can read in a day. Although I didn't think it was possible, I believe the limit I set out for TV/Video games (2-3 hours) also applies to reading. That is, unless you are switching what you are reading every so often. I like to have a couple different books on the go right now as it keeps things interesting.

However, it can also cause me to have trouble keeping the stories and their details straight. I've found the plots end up melding in weird ways or that you start noticing plot similarities between them that may or may not exist. But I enjoy that , as you may be seeing patterns that no one else has ever seen, as no one has ever read the both of them back to back. I'm speculating of course, but it's a neat idea.

As a postscript, this has me wondering if this 2-3 hour period is just the longest I can comfortably focus on anything. I have noticed I get a bit fidgety after this much time, fun activity or no. maybe this simply doesn't apply to everyone, and I should just apply this to everything in my life.

Mind And Body

I fear that I am just supplanting one vice with another. Yes, I am not wasting time on my smartphone anymore. But I am still mostly sitting around and not doing much on my off-time. I'm reading like a demon and consuming books like food. Yet this has led to even more sitting around, since reading is largely a passive experience that does not engage the body.
So I feel entirely more lazy and prone to sitting around. Because of the sudden shift of weather back towards freezing, I have even stopped biking to and from work as I had been most of the winter!

My mind is entirely more active, but my body is not. If I didn't work a job that did not allow me to sit, I would be in real trouble. Nonetheless, my butt is sore, and i have developed a cramped muscle in my knee. Even though reading is more mentally stimulating than TV, it also encourages a lot of stillness and a lack of movement. I also find my mind is always going on in the background right now, churning and processing thoughts of all sorts. Maybe I'm too used to the numbing effects of TV and the dulling effect it has on the mind. Usually, we view this as a bad thing and it certainly is. But as with anything, a bit in moderation can be good. In the modern world where information is screaming at us, a bit of numbing can be a good thing, and can slow your mind down just enough. It can be a form of cheap and simple meditation that wipes the troubles away.

A bit ludicrous, I agree. But I told you my mind was really churning these days.

Lists

A list if things I miss this month:

- YouTube
- Facebook conversations
- Funny Twitter updates
- Web comics
- Playing video games
- Podcasts
- Vegging out and binge watching Netflix
- Clicking on links people post in e-mails
- Stumbleupon
- Looking stuff up and getting an instant answer


A list of things I don't miss this month:

- YouTube comments sections
- Facebook spam
- Facebook ads
- Facebook requests
- Wading through a ton of incomprehensible Tweets to find a funny one
- memes
- Playing online video games
- Instant news on inane topics
- Trying to find something to watch on Netflix
- Stupid time wasting smartphone games
- Broken links on posts
- Buzzfeed
- The compulsive need to check my phone every 2 minutes
- Endless, endless Star Wars

2-Bit Player

I was just a kid when the first NES came out, and so like many my age video games have been a part of my life ever since. I grew up with them, and always had at least one of the consoles every generation. So to say I play, and have played a lot of video game would be an understatement.

I used to be a lot more indiscriminate in what I would play. Any old game would do as long as it was supposed to be good. Or going further back, if it was one of the few games I had. Nowadays though, I have graduated to more complicated fare, and found that I really only get sucked into the really unusual games or the ones with very fresh concepts. And I just don't have the time I used to have to play them. The problem is, I get really sucked into these when I do manage, to the exclusion of other things. I am very much an addict then, ignoring the outside world, hunger, thirst, bowel movements (oh yes). 

Perhaps I have not mentioned this before, but I really hate feeling like I need to do something, or that I am addicted. It's a feeling that stems from childhood. My mother was a big smoker, and I always vowed I would never pick up the habit. Because of this, I am very sensitive to the idea that I might be addicted to anything and become leery of it when I feel I am becoming dependent. 

So while I love video games and have no desire to part from them, it is that very same sensation that tells me I should take a break, just in case.

Cheap Trick

An activity I have been actively pursuing and enjoying this month is listening to music. Not just listening while doing other things, but attempting to do nothing else and simply let the music overtake you. Sometimes I have done this while walking, preferably in a quiet place, and letting the experience in that moment overtake you entirely. Other times, I have done this at home, alone or otherwise. I will sit and stare, out the window or at the ceiling. I clear my head and merely let my mind wander where it will. Sometimes I will be in bed or lay down for a nap when I do this, music playing softly nearby. I will shut my eyes and let my imagination conjure pictures for me, stirred by emotion or sensation.

Music is an experience, or can be. This doesn't apply to all music or all people equally. What I enjoy may be boring to you or vice versa. Much like my complaint about TV, the problem seems to be music is too easy for us to get and so we don't value it as highly as when it was a rare commodity. Bad music has always been readily available on the radio and in supermarkets and the like for free. I remember buying music on a CD, and actually treasuring it, listening to it dozens of times like it was a prize. Partly, this was youth. But scarcity also increase desire. The less you have, the more you feel attached to what little you get. 

Take my brother, having grown up post internet (he was a baby when Napster was a thing). He's never lived in a world without downloading music. This doesn't mean he doesn't like music or enjoy it. But his relationship with it is different from mine and always will be. The first time he felt the thrill of ownership was when he started a record collection, and actually had to make a decision about what to buy (or more precisely, what not to buy). The ready availability of virtually any music at your fingertips has made it easier to get than ever, but has cheapened the experience for most, who no longer have any idea what to listen to beyond what they already know. How do you know whether you like Nirvana or the Rolling Stones and why bother finding out? Download the whole discography and simply listen to it! Later though, there's like a thousand songs there.

Writer's Block

I wanted to write this month. Don't get me wrong, I am aware this blog is an almost constant stream of my writing. But that's sort of the point, it is a kind of off the top of my head writing I am doing here with very little prep beyond deciding on a topic and riffing off of it. I know what you're going to say! I know this is no doubt shocking, as the blog seems so well planned and cohesive. But it's true!

The writing I am talking about is fiction, something I have struggled with for a long time. Even though I am able to express myself fairly well, I tend to fall apart when I am not relating my ideas and trying to tell a story. For whatever reason, when I try to create a story, I am never able to articulate the points properly. I get stuck in explaining and never tell the story. Rather, I describe the story.

Partly, I have trouble reading and writing on a computer screen. Something about the glare tires my eyes out, and I very quickly zone out as a result. Partly it is also the poor weather. Since I was looking to do some writing outside to avoid the computer problem, the consistently wet or cold or both weather has caused some major impediments. I have made some abortive attempts inside, but I also find it to be a dreary affair.

So to recap: I need perfect weather in which I can write outside, relative silence so I can focus, and ample time. I have all of these things in ample measure and have still not managed to make it happen, and the month is half over. I am reminded of a quote by Bukowski, in which he says there are no ideal conditions under which to create. If you have the drive and urge to make something, you will make something, regardless of when and where you are. The rest is just excuses. So I'm forced to ask myself: Do I really want to do it? Am I capable?

Overexertion

I'm enjoying focus. Instead of feeling like my attention is divided all the time and that I require constant stimulation, I have rid myself of the habit of multitasking as part of my entertainment. I mentioned previously that I am easily bored and always seek stimuli. While this is certainly still true, I am talking about a related problem.

You see, since the advent of streaming/downloading video and smartphones, I have noticed the tendency to never pay attention to whatever it is I am doing while supposedly watching TV. I get highly irritable and impatient with any kind of waiting when doing anything with a computer or the internet. While this is not responsible for my general twitchiness, it certainly has aggravated the condition. For example, I would play video games, listen to podcasts or internet radio, and check my phone during load times. After a couple of weeks of deprivation, the mere idea of doing this seems very alien. Beyond watching stuff, I don't feel nearly as fragmented when I am doing any activity. It no longer feels like I am in 8 places at once. I still crave an active mind, but now I need a single thing to occupy it.    

Attention

I've been keeping to my movie length rule, which allows me to watch a DVD or movie in a day or the equivalent worth in a day. This means no binging or incidental watching; I need to know exactly what I want to watch or otherwise the time is lost. As I am extremely busy these days, I don't get much time in which to do this.

Combining these two factors, and I have really grown to appreciate the little amount of time I get in the day to watch a movie or a bit of a show. Unlike when you binge watch TV (as I have done, you have done, and everyone has done), you can really appreciate what you are watching much better if it is limited. I have noticed that as much as I love to watch compelling television (take your pick as an example: Breaking Bad, Kids In The Hall, Parks And Recreation), if you watch a whole bunch at once your mind goes numb and it becomes a lot less compelling. I have found the threshold of this to be 2-3 hours. This depends of the type of show and the length of an episode. If a show is half an hour long, then about 2 hours is 6 episodes, whereas with an hour long show you can watch 3. Putting a limit makes it much more enjoyable and you pay attention. If you start watching a show and really like it, it almost can be like a chore, something you must keeping doing and get through. I notice I stop paying attention when I watch too much. My mind wanders, I watch but don't see, I surf the internet. Now I can focus.

Watching

I wouldn't say I'm a TV addict, but rather a video addict. I'm sure there are those of you out there who are still primarily watching TV on a TV, but nowadays very little of my watching comes from there. Of course, I download and stream shows from the internet, but much of my video watching also comes from web series' and YouTube.

Sometimes the content is really good, sometimes not. That's the problem with web content, there's really no quality control as anyone can put up something if they want. Something most web content has in common though is it is endlessly watchable and usually not very challenging. You can watch and not watch and never be confused about what's going on. There is so much content that you can very easily fall down a YouTube hole and end up watching junky web clips or shows for hours. Make no mistake, there is a lot of great Web series, channels, and shows. But I just want to stop watching dumb wastes of time, which is unfortunately most of what's out there.

I want to watch shows and content written by people, and enjoy them in moderation. That would be a lot more sensible to me than hours of binge watching fail videos on YouTube.

Podmania

I love podcasts. I listen to them constantly, And have been heavily into them since I first got an internet capable device. There are more than 25 podcasts in my channel, and I regularly listen to more than 20 of them, most within the span of a week. I listen to them for hours every week, during travel time or in the background while doing other stuff. I have gone through their archives and listened to every podcast. In total, it's probably hundreds of hours of listening. I am an addict, and constantly need a fix.

Like the other challenges, this month I am trying to break my habit of over-consumption of a medium instead of something from my diet.  I have come to feel it is excessive and obsessive. In my defense, I listen to them in place of watching TV, and I also listen as I am out and about in the world. However, I also listen when I am playing video games or doing nothing at all, so they are a soundtrack to my life. And just like an addict, I feel as though I can;t do without them. More than internet, TV, or video games, I am much more at a loss without podcasts. Not listening to them has made me realize I had become really dependent on them when I was out in the world. It created a kind of tunnel vision in which I didn't pay attention to the world around me. Because they are voices talking, it distracts you from what's going on around you. You're still aware of the world around you, but you don't appreciate it as much.

It's different from listening to music when you're out, which can enhance the way you're feeling and your appreciation. It's something the long, long, winter made me forget.

Retooled

It's amazing how much clearer you think when you aren't constantly distracted by background noise or unintentionally zoning out on the internet. My mind feels entirely more active all the time and I seem to be more observant of the world around me. While it may not be true of everyone, I certainly find too much TV and the like to have a numbing effect that leaves me craving more and more. Not only do you stop paying attention to life but you also stop doing anything else. And the longer you do it, the less you feel like doing anything else.

I think we are fast approaching a saturation point with technology. The more indispensable it seems, the more of a backlash occurs with the next generation in line. I see it clearest in the form of my younger brother. At 12 years younger than me, he is a digital native. He has literally never known a world without the internet, in which piracy is the norm and virtually anything is available at his digital fingertips. And he has suffered a backlash because of it. He craves authentic experiences that happen to him personally, and greatly prefers physical media. He collects records and VHS tapes, not just because they're retro but because he feels like he actually owns it if he has them in this form. The younger generation is increasingly looking back to the past and to a time before the digital onslaught of the internet.

Make no mistake: the internet is here to stay, and I welcome it. It has become an invaluable tool for communication, commerce, and artistic expression. But like any tool, when we become overly reliant on it, it starts to cause problems in our lives and society. Just like a hammer, you should use it sparingly and only when necessary. No one wants to carry a hammer around all day.

Addiction

I have noticed the larger and larger part the internet has been playing in my life since the 21st century began, and it has only continued to grow now that we all carry around smartphones all the time. Whereas I once used to wish I had more time to read because it never felt like enough, I now wish I had time to read period. As though I had no choice but to watch a whole season of Breaking Bad, or play a video game for 6 hours, I would feel a pang of regret that I couldn't pull myself away and just read.

I guess my point is there is a definite addictive quality to technology of all types. Try setting deadline for how long you are allowed to stay on the internet, or watch a compelling TV show. You may be able to stop yourself, but just as likely you won't. It's very easy to overindulge, and you only need to look around when you are anywhere in public to realize what an epidemic this has become. Couples sit in restaurants and stare at their phones the whole time, and it seems like everybody on public transit can't help but stare at their phones. I know it to true. I used to be one of you.

Thresholds

As I said, I have been reading voraciously lately. While I do enjoy it, it is as much out of necessity as anything else. Something I have come to realize is I have a really low threshold for boredom. I think I have an overactive mind, because anytime I feel bored I have to alleviate it somehow as quickly as possible. This applies to everything in my life. While I certainly can appreciate a quiet moment here and there, my mind starts to scream if the sensory input I receive is not stimulating enough.

This can manifest itself in a bunch of different ways. At any job I've ever held, it makes me a conscientious worker since I keep switching tasks to be engaged. At home, once I get bored of reading, it has made me a chore machine in order to vary my activities. But like I said, in some situations, this can be a problem. In social events, I sometimes cannot contain my boredom and I can come across as brass and rude. Rather, I am being those things, almost in spite of myself. Let me be clear: I am not openly being a jerk, I simply mean I am gone quickly if I feel underwhelmed.

The point is, more chores and other unpleasant activities are much higher on my priority list since I don't have any massive time consuming hobbies to focus on anymore.

Literary Bent

Already I am feeling technologically stupid. I went to use my cell phone for some simple e-mail checking and found I was having difficulty doing it. Not that I didn't know how but rather that the process had become foreign to me, and I did not know how I acquired the knowledge as to its workings.

Without TV, internet, and video games, I am forced to read far more than usual, and I am always craving something new so that I have a variety of options at my disposal at all times. Looking at my bookshelf, I have 3 graphic novels unread on my shelf for just such an occasion. I got two from the library today, and I have already gone through them. The same is true of the three I checked out Saturday. I have a novel on the go as well, but I find I can only read so much of that before I need a change. I am reading Great Expectations, and I've never had much luck with Dickens. Although so far it is quite engaging, I must say. Since I work at the library, all I can see is more and more books that I would like to read, and suddenly feel I have all the time in the world to get through them. It's not strictly true since I'm busy with work. But it feels true, which is always a great motivator.

Lyrical

I don't "get" music.

Of course, I can appreciate the sounds of it, and enjoy listening to it. But I don't view it as an integral part of my existence the way some people seem to. As I've said, I'm a reader so I like to read album/artist reviews online and in print. When something is made to sound particularly good, I go out and pursue it but always end up disappointed. The descriptions provided by a music writer never seem to match up to reality in any meaningful way for me.

I bring this up to point out that I don't often go around town listening to music. I am usually plugged in, but I am listening to the radio or podcasts. I like to learn or hear interesting stories or comedy when I am on the go. Not that I haven't tried blasting some tunes. But within a few minutes, I get bored and lose interest, invariably switching off the music and doing something else.

Paradoxically, if I go too long without listening to music, I start to feel really down and have this strange craving, like you'd get for a cookie or bacon. It's hard to explain. But fulfilling this craving almost always happens at home and not out.

I have been remiss. Without being able to listen to anything else on the go, I finally understand what the hype is all about. Listening to music and just letting your mind wander, assuming it's the right music for the right mood and atmosphere, can really be uplifting and thought provoking in a very meaningful way. It's hard to explain in words, but it allows your mind to experience things better or in a more meaningful way. At least, that's how it seems to me today! 

Literacy

I like to read. Love it, in fact. I've been reader since I was a young age, and always enjoyed it. I always have book on the go, and go through crazy cycles of binge reading where I blast through a bunch of books. So I am regular reader. But while I do read plenty, I never feel as though it's enough. I always want to read more, especially if I am particularly engrossed in a book. I feel a sort of guilt if I spend too long doing something else like video games or just generally loafing around on the internet.

So here I am, with all the reading time in the world. I have read an almost obsessive amount since the beginning of the month. While I have enjoyed it so far, I can quickly feel I am getting too much of a good thing. Unlike a video game or binge watching a show, you can get sick of reading relatively quickly. I suspect this is because reading is much less of a passive activity than either of those. You actually need to be thinking about what you're doing and paying attention the whole time, or you're not able to continue. If I zone out for a couple of minutes while watching a show, it probably makes no difference. If you start zoning out while reading, you can end up not absorbing any information from the page, and reading the same couple of paragraphs over and over. This is one of the absolute worst things in reading, and is a good you should stop and pick it up again later.

To combat this, I have switched from just reading books to other reading material as well: magazines, comics, newspapers. I find it uses a different part of your brain, and keeps you more engaged. I've gotten through two books and a couple of comics already, with more to come. My girlfriend predicts I'll be able to get through 20 books this month. I don't know about that. The number seems high, but I've never concentrated solely on reading for this long before. So who knows?

Ulterior Motives

As all monthly challenges go, this one has an ulterior motive. Beyond simply limiting my television and internet consumption, I am looking to get a lot more reading done and force myself to go outside. With a winter seemingly never ending, I realized I fell into a bad habit of finishing work and just coming home and vegetating. I stopped hanging out with my friends, or going out for dinner or really anything out of house. I just binged on tv and video games.

With the weather far more seasonable, I have wanted to be outside more. I actually reached the point where I forgot what it was I liked about being outside! I know that sounds overly dramatic but it's true. Without the crutch of various time wasters, I've been forced to do more simply to keep myself more entertained. As much as I love reading, there's only so much you can do in a day. I'm forced to go outside, enjoy the weather, visit stores, talk to friends and make plans. I am motivated once more!

Google It

I kind of went a little crazy today. Even though I listened to music on my way to work, I felt the wistful loss of podcasts already. Yesterday on day 1 of this challenge, I was just so relieved to be able to eat meat and dairy that I didn't really think of the loss of anything else. I did feel a bit tired of reading towards the end of the day, but I chalked that up to the fatigue of the end of a work day. By the way, eating meat and dairy is amazing! I immediately felt better right from the get-go.

I keep feeling the urge to check my phone for different reasons, making me really aware of how much I relied on it. Or rather, how much I think I rely on it. For instance, I always check the weather to know what it'll be like outside before I leave in the morning. It's become a habit. But now that the worst of winter is over and it's kinda sorta spring, is it really necessary? Probably not. But it seems so important!

Or a couple of times already I've had the urge to check Google or look something up. Now, I never normally even want to do this, but the simple fact that I can't makes it seem oh so enticing.

In related news: I came up with a good rule regarding DVDs. I have to acquire them from outside the house (as in, I can't watch ones I already own) and I can't watch more than the standard movie length in a day, about an hour and a half to two hours. I think this is a fair rule, but is it in keeping with this month's challenge? Time will tell.

Technology-Free!

I'm going to break away from tradition this month and try something different. Up til now, all the challenges have been attempts to alter my diet and lead me to have a more healthy lifestyle. This month, instead of tackling bad eating habits, I am just going to tackle one of my bad habits.
Like most of you out there, I have developed an unhealthy relationship with the technology in my life. I am constantly on the internet for one reason or another, I play a ton of video games, and I watch tons of videos online and off. While I wouldn't say I am addicted to these things, I would say my consumption is excessive and unhealthy. I mean, break it down. How much time in a day do you spend on just your phone? Or how often do you go on Facebook or Twitter "just to check something," and end up wasting 20 minutes?
Since the weather outside has finally stopped being frigid, I would also like to be outside more, enjoying the sun and the wider world. I love listening to podcasts, but feel I am missing out on the world when I go out, since I am always listening to them these days. I am trying to break myself of hermity behaviour.
Well, I have had it. So for this month, I will be foregoing all of it in favor of reading and sun. Here are the rules this month!

1) No Internet
Fairly straightforward I think. This includes no Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Netflix, or any other site. There are two exceptions. One,  will need to use my computer to be able to type these posts. That will be the one time I will use it at home. As well, as part of my job I am required to check my e-mail relatively frequently, so I will check it once a day out of work necessity. My smartphone will go back to the old style dumb phone with only text and call capability. While this also means no podcasts, I will be able to listen to music, as I would on a Walkman/Discman back in the day.

2) No TV
I will watch no TV at all, or videos online, Netflix, or other video stuff. I will avoid them completely. In order to not go completely mad, I will still be able to go and see movies as long as I leave the house. I haven't decided yet, but I may allow myself to rent DVDs of movies as well.

3) No Video Games
I will play no video games of any type. No exceptions. I'll probably bust out the board games at some point.
And that's it! Here's to partying like it's 1945 or so!